Romeo and Juliet AU where Romeo is in love with Tybalt
“Do you wish to cross swords with me sir?”
“Cross swords with you sir? I most surely would sir” *wink*
“… Wait what?”Tybalt turns up to their duel with armour and a sword
Romeo turns up with roses and wine
Everyone is confused.
Mercutio is dying of laughter on the side of the stage
Please write a parody.
Comparing your relationship to Romeo and Juliet to express how in love you are is kind of like using Hamlet to demonstrate how close and well-adjusted your family life is
Shakespeare was queer? I thought he only had affairs with ladies. What dudes did he get it on with?
OH U SWEET SUMMER CHILD
so remember those sonnets, you know, about one hundred and twenty-six of them, the whole thing about “shall i compare thee to a summer’s day”
written to a hot male earl, dude
in 1640 some asshole named john literally had to change all the pronouns in those 126 sonnets because they were super fuckin queer and he was not comfy with how super fuckin queer they were
also, like, casual elizabethan bisexuality? christopher “they who love not tobacco and boys are fools” marlowe? the venetian “tit bridge”, where prostitutes were commanded by official decree to stand around topless to entice men who were bangin’ too many dudes, because there were so many gay men it was becoming a legitimate social problem?
welcome to the wonderful world of “literally everyone in the past was queer”, friend, enjoy your stay
The other day I had a really good idea for a story:
A high school Shakespeare club angrily splits into two groups when they can’t agree on the correct interpretation of Romeo and Juliet. One group thinks it’s a cautionary tale about the stupidity of youth and shallow lust; the other group think it’s a beautiful tragedy about poisonous hatred conquered by love. Reconciliation seems impossible-
–then a person from one group falls in love with a person from the other
#it would be better if somehow EVERY OTHER SHAKESPEARE WAS HAPPENING AT ONCE#like you got a benedict and beatice b-story#and then somebody see’s their dad’s ghost#and there’s cross-dressing#and three upperclassmen tell macbeth he will be drama club president
oh my god I need this
nobody dies but SEVEN PEOPLE ARE EXPELLED
