friendly reminder that stunning spells are so powerful that it only takes 7-8 to knock out a dragon the size of a small hill
60 yr old mcgonagall took four to the chest and survived
Reason #1,376 why Minerva McGonagall is a badass
Can somebody write down the rest of the reasons?!?
okayyy, you asked. 2721 words of me
fangirlinglisting the reasons i love her:
- named after her badass witch gran (and the Roman goddess of
wisdom, but no big)- displayed small
but noticeable signs of magic from her earliest hours (normal magical babies
might take days to do this but minerva
did this within hours. She is all I
AM A MAGICAL DARLING, DON’T YOU FORGET IT)- and one of those signs was making the family cat do her bidding.
CATLADY4LIFE- my other fav baby accidental magic was making her father’s
bagpipes play. How cute ?? ?- her brain was so layered and complex that she reduced the
Sorting Hat to Wall-E deciding which beaten up cup to put the spork into
(forks? Spoons? I DO NOT KNOW!). He finally decided Gryffindor, but 5.5 a minute
Hatstall is pretty amazing.- most outstanding student
in her year- square specs = hot af
- head girl. Whoomp.
- sixth/seventh year mcgonagall befriended 1st/2nd
year pamona sprout. If that’s not some adorable shit I don’t know what is???- Outstandings in every OWL and NEWT ?? amazing
- won transfiguration today’s
most promising newcomer award which is p damn impressive- also, SHE’S A FUCKING cat ANIMAGUS, became one as a STUDENT
- Quidditch! Minerva the badass quidditch player pls & thank
- was offered an amazing job right out of school but was like, yes
pls, but I want to spend one more summer with my family, can you hold the job?- And then she falls in love, right? and it’s all so great. Except
she lays up all night examining whether or not she is making the right choice.
She knows she does not want her
mother’s life, wand away, hiding who she is. Even though it hurts, she doesn’t
give in to societal conventions and is true to herself. She chooses a career rather
than sacrifice who she is to be a farmer’s wife.- Excels in her ministry job, this thing she’s worked toward for
seven years, but she’s not happy with it, right? So does she feel trapped by
it? NO. She goes and find something else.- had zero tolerance for the Ministry’s underlying prejudice and
engrained bias against Muggleborns and Muggles- she owls Hogwarts in the middle of the year like YO! Do you have
a job for me? And they owled her back within hours. Um, yes, we basically made
a position for you. Here you go. (Have you heard of any other teachers having protégés
under them? No.)- Became head of her department approximately five months after
taking the teaching position at Hogwarts- ‘if she kept letters from Douglas McGregor locked in a box under
her bed, this was (she told herself firmly) better than keeping her wand locked
under there. EXCUSE ME while I go weep. She’s suffering with this broken hear,
but she does not let it destroy her. She carries on? ?? GRIT. This lady has
grit.- Also she confides in one albus Dumbledore when he catches her
weeping. Them having confidence-exchanging conversations late into the night is
canon.- Stop for a minute and picture with me: the death of the love of
her life and the end of the war, and her old friend proposes and she says yes. They get married and live in
this tiny cottage in Hogsmeade. And they are happy ? She opens herself up to
love? And marriage? I LOVE HER.- her story is more than who she falls in love with
- did not cut off Elphinstone as a friend after he turned down her
proposal, but also didn’t give in and say yes when it didn’t feel right. Instead
she was all I don’t feel that way, can we be mates?- approximately thirteen thousand ways to show her displeasure
(has zero tolerance for bullshit)- Is only in her 30s when the marauders come to town
- she survived the
marauders- all four of them. In her house. For four years. She survived
that.- She also survived the first Wizarding War. She fought in the
Order of the Phoenix, working actively against Voldemort, to great personal
risk.- figured out where the dursleys lived and stalked #4 for an
entire day because she knew dumbledore best and knew that was where he would
bring harry, if the rumors were true- stood up to albus dumbledore’s plan, aka, advocated for what she
knew would be a shitty childhood- SHE IS ALSO A
FUCKING FEMINIST IN THE 1980s. ‘I will keep my name, thanks’ and that’s perfect.
‘traditionalists sniffed’ which to me means the Prophet’s society column had a damn thing to say about it.- She was auntie M and her nieces and nephews visited her
frequently and I am certain she had little beds for them and a biscuit tin and
made them needlework and she is so great
????????- Her husband died and
she just, carried on? She suffered but kept it private, and just moved forward
with her life and threw herself into her children. Not the healthiest of coping
mechanisms, but she did what she knew how to do to survive. GRIT.- Her fav color is green and she fucking owns that shit. Literally. Everything she wears is green.
- Can spot trouble in the Great Hall in five seconds flat
- can squelch said trouble with a stern look
- Has the rare gift of commanding a class’s attention with very
little effort- Becomes head of Gryffindor (LIONS FOR THE CUP)
- Deputy Headmistress and Headmistress of Hogwarts
- On a first name
basis with Albus Dumbledore. (how many people in the books actually call him
Albus?)- she sending out hogwarts letters to all the first years
- is in charge of wrangling first years, introducing them to
school, etc etc- catches harry flying and is all, yep, you’re our new seeker. Suck
it, Slytherin. I’m going to give you probably the first compliment you’ve had
in your life. here’s the bestest, fastest broomstick money can buy. I’ve made
arrangements with Dumbledore for you to have it.- Professor McGonagall peered sternly over her glasses at Harry. ‘I
want to hear your training hard, Potter, or I may change my mind about
punishing you.’ Then she suddenly smiled. ‘Your father would have been proud,’
she said. ‘He was an excellent Quidditch player himself.’- Minerva’s love for Quidditch and her desire to see Slytherin
eviscerated is one of my fav things about her, tbh. (Severus has had that cup
for six years and I want it back”) (“that cup looks good in my office, Potter,
I’d like to keep it there”)- this woman has
self-control. Amazing self-control. You take her interactions with Umbridge,
for instance (I will get there, no worries), and see the shade she can deliver.
You know 99.99% of the disdainful insults in her head stay there.- Giving points to harry and ron after they defeated the troll
- god damn she had
to take over hogwarts when shit got tough because albus never left
for a jaunty vacation or anything. it was more like: lolz i’m leaving, have
fun, k? and she’s all godfuckingdamnitalbus- that motherfucking sentient chess set was amazing
- needlepoint is one of her canon hobbies. Ha.
- oh shit so these motherfucking children of hers fly a car into the
whomping willow, but she does not lose her shit. She doesn’t expel them. She delivers her lecture,
but then her mouth twitches when they ask her not to take points. of course they are in trouble but she
conjures food for them because she knows they must be famished.- ‘Really,
Severus,’ said Professor McGonagall sharply. ‘I see no reason to stop the boy
playing Quidditch. This cat wasn’t hit over the head with a broomstick. There
is no evidence at all that Potter has done anything wrong.’- when she pulls harry and ron to the hospital wing to tell them
about Hermione in person, rather than letting them hear about it secondhand- her absolute impatience for Lockhart tho, and the way she
voluntells him to go find the Chamber to get him out of the way- she has to listen to albus Dumbledore at the end of every one of
harry potter’s school years explain what happened and she’s just slack-jawed
because potter tried to tell her, but
she didn’t listen, and albus, the bastard, knew
what was going to happen, and she just rolls with it. I mean I think she
probably gives him stern lectures, but she deals with it all the same- the werewolf Remus lupin comes to Hogwarts and she doesn’t make
him feel ostracized. She chats with him genially at the table his first day.- went to bat for Hermione, vouched for her, and provided her with
a time-turner so she can take all the classes she wants- being genuinely put out when she doesn’t get a standing ovation
for turning into an Animagus- reassures harry that he isn’t
going to die, but if he does die, he needn’t hand in his homework- she’s prepared to tell Harry the reason Sirius Black is chasing
after him- she concedes to his reasoning about Quidditch practice, because it would be nice to win and who knows
what she had to bribe Madame Hooch with to supervise Harry’s practice- the genuine apology she gives harry when she tells him he cannot
go to Hogsmeade- She definitely wept as she had that Firebolt stripped down, but
she did it anyway because she loves harry
and protecting him is Number One Priority- Mcgonagall’s flaring nostrils when she wants to lose her shit,
but doesn’t- She has no respect for Trelawney’s line of work but she tries to
be respectful of Trelawney herself and not say anything against her in front of
their students. She doesn’t always succeed in hiding her impatience, but she
does try.- she is on Lee Jordan’s case at every Quidditch match but she
never makes him stop because she knows he’s
funny as hell- mcgonagall getting riled up at the Quidditch match and shaking
her fist furiously is the best- shouting with peeves at the beginning of Goblet of Fire and she
is one of the few teachers who will actually deal with him- 0% intimidated by alastor moody. Bawls him out for turning draco
into a ferret when most people wouldn’t dare- in GoF she is so tense when the other schools are arriving that
harry takes notice. she is strict, but she rarely loses her composure and snaps
at students if it’s not warranted. It’s a rare occurrence.- she believes Dumbledore, and also harry, that he didn’t put his
name in the goblet- the pep talk he gives her before the first task makes me weep
every time, ok? Just do your best, let me squeeze your shoulder because I’m a
concerned mum. GOOD LUCK, HARRY, she says with a shaking voice. Mum mcgonagall
being concerned for her babe.- telling he doesn’t have a choice about getting a date for the
Yule ball (lmao every single time)- Her nearly crying when harry recounts his attack from barty jr
- Also she is cheering and waving afterwards and tells him he did
an excellent job. Praise from McGonagall was rare, but she gave it when it was
warranted.- Bawls out the minister of magic for letting a damn dementor into
the castle- believes harry immediately about Voldemort returning. Does not
question his version of events even a tiny little bit. Jumps right back into
the Order of the Phoenix.- She rode a tiger into the great hall fifth year year (at least
in the Australian version.)- In 5th year when she tells harry to fucking keep his
head down around people like umbridge. She’s genuinely telling him I KNOW,
RIGHT? But also STFU, son. AND HAVE A BISCUIT.- No one has ever been owned as badly as mcgonagall mcbadass owned
d j umbridge during her inspection and during harry’s career conference and
during the entirety of the book, actually- The way she defended harry, and encouraged, him. ‘I will make
sure you’re an auror if I personally have to tutor you, harry’- Her telling the kids that their OWL results will be a reflection
of the new regime, but that shouldn’t stop them from doing their best- went to bat for harry when umbridge was being umbridge about
harry being an auror- believed Harry about his dream about Arthur, even when it made no
sense, and ensured the weasleys got to dumbledore’s office so they could gtfo
the castle safely- the way she went out of the castle to defend hagrid. HOW DARE
YOU! It took four people STUNNING HER IN THE BACK to bring her down (as if they
could have gotten her in broad daylight)- ‘it unscrews the other way, peeves’
- Immediately jumps to Trelawney’s defense, even if she thinks the
woman is a fraud- Um hello making Harry captain of the team
- Arranging all her 3rd & 6th year
students’ schedules on the first day of school (in addition to teaching her own
damn classes)- The entire way she dealt with Neville including 1. Apologize for
not being able to let him into her NEWT class 2. Finding an alternative for him
3. Telling him she’d handle his gran- Remembering that harry wanted to be an Auror and ensuring he had
the proper classes to pursue that career, and then ‘Potter, take Weasley with you. He looks far too
happy over there.’- she is bellatrix’s mirror, in some ways, generals on opposing
sides of the war.- She didn’t immediately dismiss Harry when he
accused Malfoy of cursing the necklace that incapacitated Katie. She patiently
waited for his explanation and then told
him why it wasn’t possible.- 10/10 gift for shutting down people’s bullshit
- Gave up her Saturday mornings for months every spring to watch
incompetent sixth years learn how to Apparate- THE FIFTEEN HIGHLY UNPLEASANT MINUTES harry spends in her
company, telling him he’s lucky not to have been expelled and that she supports
his punishment. She loves Quidditch but she will never, ever support her boys
hurting another student.- After Dumbledore died, Hogwarts had been attacked, but she leapt
into action, taking command of the situation, sending people to the Hospital
Wing, summoning Molly and Arthur- called him harry after
dumbledore died, and it was short lived, but still- the way she asked Hagrid what he thought, about whether to close
Hogwarts. ‘professor Dumbledore always valued our views,’ said Professor
McGonagall kindly, ‘and so do i.’- she ushered harry out of her office so scrimgeour couldn’t
interrogate him- she stays at Hogwarts after Dumbledore dies. It’s voldemort’s
regime, but she stays here, the only home she’s ever loved, to try and keep her
students as safe as she can, as best as she can.- “Why would
Harry Potter try to get inside Ravenclaw Tower! Potter belongs in my House!”- she means so much to harry that he successfully cast a CRUCIATUS
CURSE BECAUSE SOMEONE SPIT ON HER.- Biggest hypocrite for lecturing anyone about being idiotically honorable
because she is the noblest of noble babies: “Only
the difference between truth and lies, courage and cowardice,” said Professor
McGonagall, who had turned pale, “a difference, in short, which you and your
sister seem unable to appreciate. But let me make one thing very clear. You are
not going to pass off your many ineptitudes on the students of Hogwarts. I
shall not permit it.”- Basically the entire chapter on THE SACKING OF SEVERUS
SNAPE. Including:- Finally learns her lesson and believes harry james potter
(finally!) when he warns of eminent danger- agrees to stall Voldemort so Harry can look for an object because
he’s on a mission and cannot tell her about it.- Confronts snape. Sacks snape. With style.
- “I shall expect you and the Slytherins in the
Great Hall in twenty minutes, also,” said Professor McGonagall. “If you wish to
leave with your students, we shall not stop you. But if any of you attempt to
sabotage our resistance or take up arms against us within this castle, then,
Horace, we duel to kill.”- Gets the entire castle in gear, calls up the school’s defenses,
gets the students to safety.- calls filch what every other teacher has
wanted to call filch for 25 years: ‘a blithering idiot’- sets peeve off to wreak havoc and mayhem
during the battle- mcgonagall in her tartan dressing gown and
her undone bun commanding a troop of galloping desks