Ianto: Oh, I’m straight.
Ianto: *sees Jack*
Ianto: My heterosexuality appears to have flown away with that pterodactyl.
#Ianto: *keeps the pterodactyl and his heterosexuality as pets forever#locked away in a secret high-tech sewer where no one will ever see them#but they are always there to comfort and reassure him#and he can use them to win disputes with loved ones (via bonusvampirus)
I’ve been on the internet for 19 years, since I was 15 years old. I find it HILARIOUS that the teenagers think they discovered the net and it’s only for them and that it’s weird that adults use it too. I mean, when i first got on the net there were grown ass men and women in the fandom. People with kids and mortgages and jobs. I never thought it was odd. There were one or two creeps, but generally they were super nice people who I became an extended child to. They were people I could ask awkward questions that I couldn’t ask my parents. They were the older siblings I needed. The ones that said, “Don’t date that guy, he sounds like he’s abusive” and “don’t kill yourself, I know you’re really feeling alone right now but it’ll get better” and “don’t change yourself for that guy, he’s not worth it. He’s a moron” and “I think maybe it’s time to ask your parents to take you to a counselor”
But hey, if you think it’s creepy that I exist, don’t follow me. I’m a 34 year old woman and I’m only getting older. But if you need someone to ask weird and embarrassing things, like what it’s like how to brown meat or how to look for an apartment or short cuts to getting unsightly dirt rings off your bathtub or you need someone to look over your art portfolio or what it’s like to have an IUD or get a breast reduction I’m your adult. I’ll be your big sister. Because God knows *I* needed someone to be mine when I was your age.
The other day I had a really good idea for a story:
A high school Shakespeare club angrily splits into two groups when they can’t agree on the correct interpretation of Romeo and Juliet. One group thinks it’s a cautionary tale about the stupidity of youth and shallow lust; the other group think it’s a beautiful tragedy about poisonous hatred conquered by love. Reconciliation seems impossible-
–then a person from one group falls in love with a person from the other
#it would be better if somehow EVERY OTHER SHAKESPEARE WAS HAPPENING AT ONCE#like you got a benedict and beatice b-story#and then somebody see’s their dad’s ghost#and there’s cross-dressing#and three upperclassmen tell macbeth he will be drama club president
oh my god I need this
nobody dies but SEVEN PEOPLE ARE EXPELLED



























