{"id":97200,"date":"2016-06-12T22:39:48","date_gmt":"2016-06-12T22:39:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/06\/12\/okay-kids-listen-up-your-german-aunt-natalie\/"},"modified":"2016-06-12T22:39:48","modified_gmt":"2016-06-12T22:39:48","slug":"okay-kids-listen-up-your-german-aunt-natalie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/06\/12\/okay-kids-listen-up-your-german-aunt-natalie\/","title":{"rendered":"okay kids listen up – your German aunt Natalie (dat me) is gonna tell you about that beetle"},"content":{"rendered":"

joshua-dun-with-u<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

* yes I mean that blue fucking beetle in the masterpiece \u201cCaptain America – The First Avenger That Had To Go And Kiss Sharon What The Heck Steve\u201d <\/p>\n

* I\u2019m telling you this cause I drive that lil piece of shit car through good old Germany every day and it\u2019s not fun okay <\/p>\n

* first of all it\u2019s a \u201cK\u00e4fer\u201d not a beetle if I gotta hear one more German say biiitel in that \u201cwhat is English\u201d voice I\u2019m gonna<\/p>\n

* so yeah that car? No. Why. Steve wHY<\/p>\n

* it\u2019s Steve Sam and Bucky Baby right? Right. Let me tell you these three men are SUFFERING <\/p>\n

* Bucky? Just forget about him. Lost the feeling in his legs two hours ago, hits his head on the roof every time (every. time.) there\u2019s a bump in the road THIS MAN HAS HURT ENOUGH GODDAMNIT<\/p>\n

* no for real the backseats weren\u2019t built for humans let alone the motherfucking winter soldier<\/p>\n

* Stevie and Sam darling can\u2019t be more comfy either like shit this car is TINY<\/p>\n

* that stuff Sharon \u201clet\u2019s touch lips\u201d Carter got you there? Good luck getting that in the trunk. TheTrunk\u2122 that\u2019s apparently built for one single egg-shaped thing. No one knows what that thing is. Everything that is NOT that thing won\u2019t fit <\/p>\n

* It just. Doesn\u2019t fit. \ud83d\ude42 <\/p>\n

* THE GEARSHIFT OKAY like \u201clet\u2019s escape?\u201d – NO how bout no cause the gearshift is stuck sorry Steve you wanted to what? Drive?? Backwards???? Nah man. This thing is stuck into the next century and you better not use your super soldier mojo like the only thing you\u2019ll manage is to break the handle clean off <\/p>\n

* THERE ARE THREE MORE THAN GROWN MEN IN THIS CAR AND IT\u2019S SUNNY OUTSIDE YOU DON\u2019T GET IT THEY ARE COOKING IN THIS TIN CAN LIKE THE FUCKING INSTANT RAVIOLI THEY ARE <\/p>\n

* trust me. Boiling heat. They started building real air condition after that car thanks VW <\/p>\n

* did I mention that? It\u2019s not fast?? Like? At all?? Like? You wanna drive on a fucking highway for more than 5 minutes with some kinda decent speed and this thing will need a day nap after. Let\u2019s remember they\u2019re literally escaping from iron man lol<\/p>\n

* YOU DONT GET IT. THIS IS LITERALLY. THE MOST. IMPRACTICAL CAR. IN THE WORLD. UGH<\/p>\n

* at least it has a fuckin flower vase next to the fucking steering wheel cheers Steve Rogers good luck with that you iDIO T<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

joshua-dun-with-u: * yes I mean that blue fucking beetle in the masterpiece \u201cCaptain America – The First Avenger That Had To Go And Kiss Sharon What The Heck Steve\u201d * I\u2019m telling you this cause I drive that lil piece of shit car through good old Germany every day and it\u2019s not fun okay * … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “okay kids listen up – your German aunt Natalie (dat me) is gonna tell you about that beetle”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[10290,12191,4],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97200"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=97200"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/97200\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=97200"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=97200"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=97200"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}