{"id":91820,"date":"2016-07-20T17:54:19","date_gmt":"2016-07-20T17:54:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/07\/20\/god-dammit-mason-everyone-is-saying-that-the\/"},"modified":"2016-07-20T17:54:19","modified_gmt":"2016-07-20T17:54:19","slug":"god-dammit-mason-everyone-is-saying-that-the","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/07\/20\/god-dammit-mason-everyone-is-saying-that-the\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

god-dammit-mason<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

Everyone is saying that the professor is grinding the Pok\u00e9mon into candy, but consider the following:<\/p>\n

\u2022 The professor frantically running around with assistants, inspecting hundreds of thousands of pidgeys a day, getting bitten and screeched at while they try to figure out if this pidgey has been tagged yet so they release them back to track their migration<\/p>\n

\u2022 Panicked interns trying to scoop the ekanses back into their tank because theyre freaking out the rattatas<\/p>\n

\u2022 Three caterpies climbed into a vent and evolved into metapods that are too far in to reach so six underpaid college students are trying to dismantle ductwork<\/p>\n

\u2022 Theres a big door marked \u201cKEEP OUT\u201d because a dozen oddish evolved into a squad of Vileplumes and until they stop releasing stun spores the entire room is just off limits<\/p>\n

\u2022 Hundreds of researchers running on red bull and determination trying to tag and examine all the Pokemon but having to turn off the machine every once in a while to the discontent of trainers who are all getting a \u201cSorry, the servers are currently down\u201d message at LEAST twice a day<\/p>\n

\u2022 \u201cGPS not found\u201d flashes while returning a big group and suddenly Florida has been gifted 6,000 mankeys right in the middle of Epcot<\/p>\n

\u2022 Someone in the back room up to their waist in stale dog treats with a bunch of little stamps. They sigh deeply at how gullible Pokemon trainers are that they think these things actually do anything other than excite the Pokemon so much they evolve<\/p>\n

\u2022 Actual science professor surrounded by chaos and interns and a budget just too small<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

god-dammit-mason: Everyone is saying that the professor is grinding the Pok\u00e9mon into candy, but consider the following: \u2022 The professor frantically running around with assistants, inspecting hundreds of thousands of pidgeys a day, getting bitten and screeched at while they try to figure out if this pidgey has been tagged yet so they release them … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[1287,244,4],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/91820"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=91820"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/91820\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=91820"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=91820"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=91820"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}