{"id":272147,"date":"2013-06-21T16:57:19","date_gmt":"2013-06-21T16:57:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/06\/21\/macabrekawaii-dualscar-captainexposition\/"},"modified":"2018-10-17T16:25:50","modified_gmt":"2018-10-17T16:25:50","slug":"macabrekawaii-dualscar-captainexposition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/06\/21\/macabrekawaii-dualscar-captainexposition\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<div id='gallery-1' class='gallery galleryid-272147 gallery-columns-3 gallery-size-thumbnail'><figure class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<div class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/06\/21\/macabrekawaii-dualscar-captainexposition\/attachment\/272148\/'><img width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/06\/tumblr_mgfivn4SJ31r5s4n9o1_500-150x150.gif\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" loading=\"lazy\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/06\/tumblr_mgfivn4SJ31r5s4n9o1_500-150x150.gif 150w, https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/06\/tumblr_mgfivn4SJ31r5s4n9o1_500-100x100.gif 100w\" sizes=\"100vw\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/div><\/figure>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/macabrekawaii.tumblr.com\/post\/52280144676\/dualscar-captainexposition\" target=\"_blank\">macabrekawaii<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/dualscar.tumblr.com\/post\/52279825835\/captainexposition-shermansgallifreyan\" target=\"_blank\">dualscar<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/captainexposition.tumblr.com\/post\/52269057234\/shermansgallifreyan-oxboxer-feferipixies\" target=\"_blank\">captainexposition<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/shermansgallifreyan.tumblr.com\/post\/52155877181\/oxboxer-feferipixies-the-fandoms-are-cool\" target=\"_blank\">shermansgallifreyan<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/oxboxer.tumblr.com\/post\/40747073337\/feferipixies-the-fandoms-are-cool\" target=\"_blank\">oxboxer<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/feferipixies.tumblr.com\/post\/40735498810\/the-fandoms-are-cool-everythingis19\" target=\"_blank\">feferipixies<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/the-fandoms-are-cool.tumblr.com\/post\/40717252813\/everythingis19-cosmicsyzygy-look-i-made-a\" target=\"_blank\">the-fandoms-are-cool<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/everythingis19.tumblr.com\/post\/40630746815\/cosmicsyzygy-look-i-made-a-gif-of-this-most\" target=\"_blank\">everythingis19<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/cosmicsyzygy.tumblr.com\/post\/40199444691\/look-i-made-a-gif-of-this-most-awesome-wizard-at\" target=\"_blank\">cosmicsyzygy<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><em>Look, I made a gif of this most awesome wizard at the Leaky Cauldron!<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>DUDE IS READING \u2018A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME\u2019 BY STEPHEN HAWKING<\/p>\n<p>I NEVER REALIZED<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><em>are you serious<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I always assumed wizards just ignored science, because the fact that \u201cmagic\u201d exists, can explain anything. But there are MuggleBorn wizards, ones who, until they were eleven, lived in the real world and learned science and things. Did they all just abandon that normal, muggle knowledge, like Harry did? It\u2019s always been there, itching in the back of my mind.<\/p>\n<p>FOUR FOR YOU SCIENCE WIZARD<\/p>\n<p>YOU GO SCIENCE WIZARD<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>can we point out that he\u2019s doing wandless magic too<\/p>\n<p>like voldemort couldnt even do that shit<\/p>\n<p>molly fuckin weasley couldnt fuckin do that<\/p>\n<p><em>who are you<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Quick, somebody write a book series about the adventures of Magic Prodigy Science Wizard!!!<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>PLEASE SOMEONE JUST DO IT<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"p1\">Alan Baker had no use for wands, of course. If one were to\u00a0<em>Prior Incantato<\/em>\u00a0his outdated, duct-taped rod of walnut wood and dragon heartstring, its most recent use would have been the enchantment of the long-lived neurons in Alan\u2019s own mind. This enchantment, possible only for those who were capable of seeing themselves as a complex amalgamation of neural impulses, allowed him to bypass both wands and words. Alan did this, not for show, not for power, but because wandwork distracted him from his reading.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Unfortunately, there was no legal spell to get rid of barflies.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cHey- hey mate, you gotta- gotta minute to-\u201c<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\"><em>Sobrius<\/em>, Alan thought, placing one hand on his neighbor\u2019s forehead without looking up. He pondered whether or not to cast a silencing barrier, even in violation of the Leaky Cauldron\u2019s safety code.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cThanks,\u201d said the now-sober man, \u201cReadin\u2019 more of that Muggle trash, I see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Alan closed his eyes and counted to three, but when he opened them, the man was still there. Alan lowered his \u201cmuggle trash\u201d in defeat, meeting the baggy, bloodshot eyes of the wizard sitting across from him.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Alan leaned forward, placing his hands steeple-like on the table. \u201cMr. Fletcher, do you know why time turners don\u2019t send you into space?\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cThe sky, y\u2019mean? Cause they\u2019re fer time turnin\u2019, not apparation.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Alan had to take a deep breath. \u201cNo,\u201d he replied, \u201cIf time turners weren\u2019t anchored to anything, the Earth\u2019s rotation alone would be enough to ensure a time traveler\u2019s demise. But someone at the ministry was clever enough to anchor them to a carefully guarded object that never moves relative to the Earth.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cFascinat\u2019n,\u201d slurred Mundungus, whose eyes had glazed over once it became clear that Alan didn\u2019t actually have a time turner on him.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cBut time turners are still very limited,\u201d continued Alan, more to himself than to Mundungus, \u201cThey can\u2019t go more than seven hours back, and not forward at all, and only in increments of one hour, and they only work on Earth\u2026 no, they\u2019re very clumsy, if one truly pauses to think about it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cWhat\u2019s yer point?\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cMy\u00a0<em>point\u00a0<\/em>is that while wizards are slowly stagnating in their backwards remnant of the Dark Ages, Muggles are making progress, ever reaching for the light. Do you know that they don\u2019t need magic to craft a hand of living silver?\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cBah,\u201d was Mundungus\u2019s only reply, \u201cYou\u2019d be best mates with that Weasley nutcase at the ministry, you would.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Alan stood up, silently casting an\u00a0<em>infantes gelata\u00a0<\/em>to check for paradoxes. \u201cI don\u2019t know why I bother with you,\u201d he sighed, \u201cyou\u2019ve just wasted another two minutes of my time. Perhaps I bother because I have time to waste.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">And he twisted, as if to apparate, but instead faded out of existence with a distinct\u00a0<em>vworp<\/em>. The air swirled in the wake of his departure, blowing back Mundungus\u2019s straggly ginger hair.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cMuggleborns,\u201d the short wizard muttered, then turned back to his drink.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">\u2022\u2022\u2022\u2022\u2022\u2022\u2022\u2022<\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\">Thirty minutes earlier, Alan lounged contentedly within his quieting barrier, stirring his cup of tea absently and rereading one of his favourite Muggle books. He wondered, vaguely, which planet held the nearest sapient life, and what their magic would look like\u2026<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>This rereading, however, would be slightly shorter than the last. Even within the barrier, the presence of another at the table tickled at Alan\u2019s consciousness. He set down his book (rather forcefully, he had to admit,) and looked up. The bloodshot eyes of Mundungus Fletcher didn\u2019t meet him when his own rose.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHello,\u201d mouthed the man. <em>Finite Incantatum,<\/em> thought Alan.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHello,\u201d he answered, \u201cCan I help you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo, not really. Well, maybe. Well, probably. Have you seen anything strange lately? Disappearing cats, people moving backwards, variances in the time vortex causing precise and intentional reversal of the course of events?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Alan couldn\u2019t help but stare. \u201cEr\u2026now that you mention it, I was just\u2026\u201d he trailed off as he glanced out the window and did a double take. There was a 1960s-style Muggle police telephone box in the middle of Diagon Alley. \u201c\u2026Is\u2026is that a telephone box?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo. Yes. Recreation. Mock-up. Don\u2019t worry, nobody will notice,\u201d the man said, waving his hand dismissively even as he pulled on a pair of what appeared to be cheap 3-D glasses. \u201cWhat I want to know,\u201d he murmured conspiratorially, \u201cis what\u2019s giving you that floaty, aurary, bizarrey stuff all over you, because that should not be happening to a human. Person. I said person\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Alan\u2019s eyebrows furrowed. \u201cFirst of all, this is Diagon Alley. Most people out there wouldn\u2019t know a police box from a pillbox, especially given it\u2019s bright blue. Second of all, those glasses shouldn\u2019t give you the ability to see what you\u2019re seeing. And thirdly,\u00a0<em>Expelliarmus.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cExpelliwhat?\u201d the man squawked, just as a long, chunky metallic object with a blue tip shot out of his jacket pocket and into Alan\u2019s hand. A quick Identification spell told him all he needed to know.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFuzzy logic neural interface configured for ease of use, limited nonverbal manipulation of mechanical and electronic objects\u2026Interesting. And leaps and bounds beyond anything wizards or Muggles can conjure up. What are you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The man stared at him for a few minutes before breaking out in a wide smile. \u201cHello. I\u2019m the Doctor. Let me tell you a little bit about the universe\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>IT GOT BETTER<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>I am done, this is the end of the world, it\u2019s all downhill from here<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><img src=\"https:\/\/66.media.tumblr.com\/ba574808e3d1112be0d669847334aada\/tumblr_inline_mor4h1A0Kv1qz4rgp.gif\" \/><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>macabrekawaii: dualscar: captainexposition: shermansgallifreyan: oxboxer: feferipixies: the-fandoms-are-cool: everythingis19: cosmicsyzygy: Look, I made a gif of this most awesome wizard at the Leaky Cauldron! DUDE IS READING \u2018A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME\u2019 BY STEPHEN HAWKING I NEVER REALIZED are you serious I always assumed wizards just ignored science, because the fact that \u201cmagic\u201d exists, can explain &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/06\/21\/macabrekawaii-dualscar-captainexposition\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"gallery","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[13,3483,151],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272147"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=272147"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272147\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":272149,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272147\/revisions\/272149"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=272147"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=272147"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=272147"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}