{"id":243862,"date":"2013-11-18T13:21:39","date_gmt":"2013-11-18T13:21:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/11\/18\/1-there-will-be-some-days-when-you-close-your\/"},"modified":"2013-11-18T13:21:39","modified_gmt":"2013-11-18T13:21:39","slug":"1-there-will-be-some-days-when-you-close-your","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2013\/11\/18\/1-there-will-be-some-days-when-you-close-your\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

1. There will be some days when you close your eyes while crossing the street, maybe because you want to see what fate has in store for you, or maybe because your depression is running rampant again and you don\u2019t know how to calm her. It\u2019s okay. I will still love you.<\/p>\n

2. There will be a year, or a series of years when your birthday doesn\u2019t feel special. Celebrate anyway. Because people spent time baking you a cake and buying you cards and even if they\u2019re your family and they\u2019re obligated to, they still love you. Cherish that love. Revel in it. It is the best gift you will ever receive.<\/p>\n

3. You will learn that the saddest word in the English language is stay. Whether it\u2019s your mother\u2019s voice whispering it before you leave for college, or your ex-lover\u2019s desperate screams as you walk out of the house, it will always be a hard word to hear. Sometimes you should listen to it, other times you shouldn\u2019t. Trust yourself. Go with your gut.<\/p>\n

4. Along with hearing the word stay, you will also hear the word why from every person who is remotely related to you. Why did you get that tattoo? Why did you try to kill yourself? Why aren\u2019t you married yet? You don\u2019t have to answer them. Be selfish. Keep somethings to yourself.<\/p>\n

5. Some nights you won\u2019t be able to sleep. You will lie awake at 2 am and contemplate existentialism and wonder if the French had a point. Get up. Get out of your bed. Do something. Because even if there is no God, what you do matters, who you are matters. You matter to me.<\/p>\n

6. Some days you will want to run away and never return. So go. Drive to a small town in the Northwest, maybe Oregon, and settle down there for a while. Tell people your name is Elizabeth, because you loved Jane Austen as a child and because this a town full of strangers and who\u2019s to know the difference? Don\u2019t be selfish. Call your mother each night and remind her that you love her. Come back home when you find yourself seeing your sadness painted in the shadows, and when you feel more at home in the arms of a stranger than on your own.<\/p>\n

7. There will be several nights when you lose yourself in the medicine cabinet, because liquor and morphine seem like a faster cure than time. It\u2019s okay. I will still love you in the morning.<\/p>\n

8. One day, in the midst of work, you will learn to forgive. It will start out with a simple reminder of the past, maybe a facebook notification from an old schoolmate or a wedding announcement from an ex-lover. In that moment you will learn that yearning for the past isn\u2019t romantic, it\u2019s stupid, and that if Gatsby had just let go of the green light he would\u2019ve lived. So forgive your past, it didn\u2019t know any better, and move on.<\/p>\n

9. Leaving home will hurt, but soon you will learn that home isn\u2019t a place but a feeling, and that there is a compass on your heart that points directly to that feeling. Follow that compass. Don\u2019t get sidetracked by boys who don\u2019t care or alcohol that doesn\u2019t forgive. If you follow that compass, no matter how lost you get, you will always have a home.<\/p>\n

10. The hardest lesson you will ever learn will be to love yourself. But you can do it. There will always be days when you hate yourself, days when you wish you had never been born. But darling you are beautiful, and if Shakespeare had met you you would\u2019ve inspired his 18th sonnet, and if Monet had known you he would\u2019ve given up painting water lilies and chosen to paint you instead. I know it\u2019s hard to love yourself, but sometimes it\u2019s okay to be a little selfish with your love.<\/p>\n

11. When you begin to feel worthless, remember that the stars died for you. You are made of elements that are thousands of years old, elements that make up every atom of your being. When you want to cut your wrists, remember that the souls of stars live in your veins. Don\u2019t kill them. Don\u2019t be selfish.<\/p>\n

12. Some days will be beautiful. Live for those days. Live for the days when the sun shines on your soul and the smile on your face isn\u2019t forced. Live for the days when you don\u2019t give a fuck what anyone thinks because your scars are a part of your story and you don\u2019t need someone else\u2019s approval to wear them with pride.<\/p>\n

Live for the life you always wanted but were too scared to pursue.<\/p>\n

Live for you. Live for me. Live for every person who has ever loved you, for the people who have come before you so that you may be here today.<\/p>\n

Live for the fire that burns in your soul, that tells you: keep going, you\u2019re almost there, just a little farther. Because when Rome burned down the emperor didn\u2019t run away, he stayed and he sang for his people. Stay. Sing for your people. Sing for us.<\/p>\n

Are you listening? Because this is your life, singing a siren song to capture your attention and steer away from the rocks, to guide you back home.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\n

The Twelve-Step Program for Life, by M.K.<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Listen. Breathe. Keep listening. Keep breathing.<\/p>\n

(via la-bryinth<\/a>)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1. There will be some days when you close your eyes while crossing the street, maybe because you want to see what fate has in store for you, or maybe because your depression is running rampant again and you don\u2019t know how to calm her. It\u2019s okay. I will still love you. 2. There will … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"quote","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[353,4],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/243862"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=243862"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/243862\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=243862"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=243862"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=243862"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}