{"id":203718,"date":"2014-06-30T14:43:52","date_gmt":"2014-06-30T14:43:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2014\/06\/30\/nearly-everyone-with-adhd-answers-an-emphatic-yes\/"},"modified":"2014-06-30T14:43:52","modified_gmt":"2014-06-30T14:43:52","slug":"nearly-everyone-with-adhd-answers-an-emphatic-yes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2014\/06\/30\/nearly-everyone-with-adhd-answers-an-emphatic-yes\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"
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Nearly everyone with ADHD answers an emphatic yes to the question: \u201cHave you always been more sensitive than others to rejection, teasing, criticism, or your own perception that you have failed or fallen short?\u201d This is the definition of a condition called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. When I ask ADHDers to elaborate on it, they say: \u201cI\u2019m always tense. I can never relax. I can\u2019t just sit there and watch a TV program with the rest of the family. I can\u2019t turn my brain and body off to go to sleep at night. Because I\u2019m sensitive to my perception that other people disapprove of me, I am fearful in personal interactions.\u201d They are describing the inner experience of being hyperactive or hyper-aroused. Remember that most kids after age 14 don\u2019t show much overt hyperactivity, but it\u2019s still present internally, if you ask them about it.<\/p>\n

The emotional response to the perception of failure is catastrophic for those with the condition. The term \u201cdysphoria\u201d means \u201cdifficult to bear,\u201d and most people with ADHD report that they \u201ccan hardly stand it.\u201d They are not wimps; disapproval hurts them much more than it hurts neurotypical people.<\/p>\n

If emotional pain is internalized, a person may experience depression and loss of self-esteem in the short term. If emotions are externalized, pain can be expressed as rage at the person or situation that wounded them.<\/p>\n

In the long term, there are two personality outcomes. The person with ADHD becomes a people pleaser, always making sure that friends, acquaintances, and family approve of him. After years of constant vigilance, the ADHD person becomes a chameleon who has lost track of what she wants for her own life. Others find that the pain of failure is so bad that they refuse to try anything unless they are assured of a quick, easy, and complete success. Taking a chance is too big an emotional risk. Their lives remain stunted and limited.<\/p>\n

For many years, rejection-sensitive dysphoria has been the hallmark of what has been called atypical depression. The reason that it was not called \u201ctypical\u201d depression is that it is not depression at all but the ADHD nervous system\u2019s instantaneous response to the trigger of rejection.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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“Devastated by Disapproval”<\/a> – William Dodson, M.D., ADDitude Magazine<\/p>\n

I did both of those two personality outcomes. Magic or something, I guess. -J<\/i><\/p>\n

(via coachmcguirkscowtattoo<\/a>)<\/p>\n

My life just suddenly made so much more sense. Jesus Christ.<\/p>\n

(via gadaboutgreen<\/a>)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nearly everyone with ADHD answers an emphatic yes to the question: \u201cHave you always been more sensitive than others to rejection, teasing, criticism, or your own perception that you have failed or fallen short?\u201d This is the definition of a condition called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. When I ask ADHDers to elaborate on it, they say: \u201cI\u2019m … <\/p>\n

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