{"id":151245,"date":"2015-06-05T17:06:51","date_gmt":"2015-06-05T17:06:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/06\/05\/lochnessmonsterofficial-dogs-are-the-literal\/"},"modified":"2015-06-05T17:06:51","modified_gmt":"2015-06-05T17:06:51","slug":"lochnessmonsterofficial-dogs-are-the-literal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/06\/05\/lochnessmonsterofficial-dogs-are-the-literal\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

lochnessmonsterofficial<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

Dogs are the literal best and let me tell you why.<\/p>\n

When my parents are out of town, my pup Remmy sleeps downstairs with me. I don\u2019t mind because the basement is chilly sometimes and he\u2019s a fuzzy little space heater. But he always does this weird thing and I didn\u2019t figure out why until last night.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m a stomach-sleeper, while the rest of my family are back-sleepers. So Remmy has taken up this very different behavior with me (my family says he doesn\u2019t do it with them). It always takes me a while to settle down, but when I do, Remmy takes his head off of his paws and rests it square in the center of my back.<\/p>\n

So I\u2019m thinking, \u201cWhat\u2019s the point of that? It can\u2019t be comfortable. It cranes his neck in a funny way, and besides, every time I breathe his head goes up and down. That\u2019s a weird thing.\u201d So I formulate a hypothesis, and test it.<\/p>\n

Last night, I got comfortable, Remmy put his head on my back, I waited a while, then I held my breath. It took him a while to react, but when he did, he fuckin lost it. He started whining and yipping, and repeatedly licking my face and hands. And I was like oh my god.<\/p>\n

Conclusion: my dog noticed that I slept in a way that was different from the rest of my family, thought \u201cthat kid is gonna die\u201d and made sure that I never stopped breathing in the middle of the night.<\/p>\n

Dogs are fuckin smart as hell. What a wonderful animal.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

lochnessmonsterofficial: Dogs are the literal best and let me tell you why. When my parents are out of town, my pup Remmy sleeps downstairs with me. I don\u2019t mind because the basement is chilly sometimes and he\u2019s a fuzzy little space heater. But he always does this weird thing and I didn\u2019t figure out why … <\/p>\n

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