{"id":145900,"date":"2015-07-12T22:39:44","date_gmt":"2015-07-12T22:39:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/07\/12\/since-youre-the-only-male-writer-of-fanfic-i-know\/"},"modified":"2015-07-12T22:39:44","modified_gmt":"2015-07-12T22:39:44","slug":"since-youre-the-only-male-writer-of-fanfic-i-know","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/07\/12\/since-youre-the-only-male-writer-of-fanfic-i-know\/","title":{"rendered":"Since you’re the only male writer of fanfic I know well enough to talk to… When you read smutty stories, what does not work for you because you go all ‘Wait, my body does not work like that!’? I’m really curious, because I’m sure most female writers like me commit some those things, that actually don’t work or seem strange to a man. Don’t care if you answer in public or private, but I’d really like to know (and I’m not talking about the obvious ‘no lube’ stuff and such)"},"content":{"rendered":"

copperbadge<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

Nah, I\u2019ve never really had a problem with it, though it took me a while to work out why. I was reading this essay on the amount of shaming that sometimes goes on for people writing\u00a0\u201cunrealistic\u201d sex, and the person who was writing it hit the nail on the head so to speak \u2013 it\u2019s a fantasy. This isn\u2019t journalism.\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

<\/i><\/p>\n

Literary erotica isn\u2019t about describing a sex act, that\u2019s not its purpose. In broad terms, literary erotica is usually<\/i> about creating a fantasy. People write about sex for lots of different reasons, and they create those fantasies with different endgames in mind (titillation, creating a sense of emotional intimacy, because they\u2019re horny, because they have this specific fantasy and want to live it out on the page, because they want to explore a kink in a safely fictional world) but the upshot is that the sex is about something other than the mechanics of the sexual act.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t care about realism when I read or write porn because realism isn\u2019t why the porn is there. Realistically speaking, people often don\u2019t smell that great and kissing tastes mostly like mouth and almost everyone looks ridiculous during sex. People don\u2019t come at the same time and hairs get in places hairs shouldn\u2019t be and sometimes there are amusing noises.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But we know all that, and we can get it in real life, so we don\u2019t need it in fiction. Fiction is a place where the writer controls everything and the writer says what\u2019s real and what\u2019s not, and if the writer wants to write \u201cunrealistic\u201d sex, that\u2019s in service of a purpose that I find laudable, the expression of fantasy linked to sexual desire. Whether the audience buys into the unrealism or not is dependent somewhat on the writer, but I think the high level of buy-in we see in fandom says that as a culture we\u2019ve decided fantasy is an acceptable part of the sexual act in fanfic. I\u2019m not saying everyone has to<\/i>, but I certainly have, which is why unrealistic sex doesn\u2019t especially bother me as long as it\u2019s well-written or I can see where it\u2019s going. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

copperbadge: Nah, I\u2019ve never really had a problem with it, though it took me a while to work out why. I was reading this essay on the amount of shaming that sometimes goes on for people writing\u00a0\u201cunrealistic\u201d sex, and the person who was writing it hit the nail on the head so to speak \u2013 … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “Since you’re the only male writer of fanfic I know well enough to talk to… When you read smutty stories, what does not work for you because you go all ‘Wait, my body does not work like that!’? I’m really curious, because I’m sure most female writers like me commit some those things, that actually don’t work or seem strange to a man. Don’t care if you answer in public or private, but I’d really like to know (and I’m not talking about the obvious ‘no lube’ stuff and such)”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[16723,247,4],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145900"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=145900"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145900\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=145900"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=145900"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=145900"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}