{"id":125198,"date":"2015-11-28T18:06:47","date_gmt":"2015-11-28T18:06:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/11\/28\/nikkibot3000-kateordie\/"},"modified":"2018-09-04T14:37:24","modified_gmt":"2018-09-04T14:37:24","slug":"nikkibot3000-kateordie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/11\/28\/nikkibot3000-kateordie\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<div id='gallery-1' class='gallery galleryid-125198 gallery-columns-3 gallery-size-thumbnail'><figure class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<div class='gallery-icon portrait'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/11\/28\/nikkibot3000-kateordie\/attachment\/125199\/'><img width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo1_250-150x150.gif\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" loading=\"lazy\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo1_250-150x150.gif 150w, https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo1_250-100x100.gif 100w\" sizes=\"100vw\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/div><\/figure><figure class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<div class='gallery-icon portrait'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/11\/28\/nikkibot3000-kateordie\/attachment\/125200\/'><img width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo2_250-150x150.gif\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" loading=\"lazy\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo2_250-150x150.gif 150w, https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/tumblr_n6i9liOfPu1scvx6xo2_250-100x100.gif 100w\" sizes=\"100vw\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/div><\/figure>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/nikkibot3000.tumblr.com\/post\/119540388374\" target=\"_blank\">nikkibot3000<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/kateordie.tumblr.com\/post\/119536438412\" target=\"_blank\">kateordie<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/lipstickstainedlove.tumblr.com\/post\/119532725402\" target=\"_blank\">lipstickstainedlove<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/thearomantic.tumblr.com\/post\/119449405095\" target=\"_blank\">thearomantic<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/octoberreads.tumblr.com\/post\/112652426681\" target=\"_blank\">octoberreads<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/dynastylnoire.tumblr.com\/post\/110659054440\" target=\"_blank\">dynastylnoire<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/angelicroses.tumblr.com\/post\/107389616878\" target=\"_blank\">angelicroses<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/bonequeer.tumblr.com\/post\/93801717639\" target=\"_blank\">bonequeer<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/radicalrebellion.tumblr.com\/post\/92933768278\" target=\"_blank\">radicalrebellion<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/baronsledjoys.tumblr.com\/post\/92919873074\" target=\"_blank\">baronsledjoys<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http:\/\/firecannotkillafitblr.tumblr.com\/post\/88896232244\" target=\"_blank\">firecannotkillafitblr<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>This drives me mad. I used to work in a bookstore, and was talking to my coworker and he just yelled out \u201cstop flirting with me!\u201d at this ridiculous volume and it was humiliating because\u00a0<br \/>1. I wasn\u2019t<br \/>2. I got in trouble for acting unprofessional\u00a0<br \/>3. He embarrassed me in front of a line of people<br \/>4. And he only stopped insisting that I was flirting when my boyfriend (who is now my husband) said, \u201cdude, trust me, she\u2019s not flirting with you\u201d to him<\/p>\n<p>That asshole respected my BOYFRIEND saying I wasn\u2019t flirting more than he respected me saying it and I was the one who was talking! The whole scene got me in trouble at work. And the most ridiculous part is we were talking about a fucking book. In a bookstore.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>One time, my ex boyfriend had a crush on some girl, and said that he thought he might have \u201ca chance\u201d with her.<\/p>\n<p>When I asked him what made him think that, he said \u201cWell, she talks to me.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Can we also add that this is why a lot of women do the resting bitch face when out in public. Cause dudes swear a glance or a smile is flirting.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>So yesterday something that perfectly illustrates this happened. I work at a fast food place and this guy comes in at 7am on a Sunday, still probably drunk from the night before, and when I smiled and said goodmorning he said \u201cDid you just say that because you\u2019re being paid to say that?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I repressed my urge to sarcastically answer, and said \u201cNope, I just enjoy saying hi to everyone!\u201d To which he responded, \u201cOh, so you weren\u2019t flirting with me then.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dude, I\u2019m not flirting with your gross 7am-on-a-Sunday-ass, trust me.<\/p>\n<p>My defense mechanism when I\u2019m uncomfortable at work is to smile, so I did that and said \u201cIs there anything I can get you this morning?\u201d to which he responded,<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThere, you just smiled! What does that mean?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>At this point I was fed up, so I said,\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI smile at everyone sir, its just what I do. What can I get you, coffee, a bagel?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And he said \u201cI\u2019m gonna be watching to see if you smile at everyone. I don\u2019t like it when girls lie to me\u201d and then ordered a coffee and a muffin like he hadn\u2019t just said something at 11 on the \u201cIs this guy a serial rapist\u201d scale (where 0 is \u2018no\u2019 and 10 is \u2018Yes, run away as fast as you can right now.\u201d).<\/p>\n<p>Then he sat there for another hour and a half, staring at me from his table. When he got up and left he came back to the counter, and said \u201cYou do smile at everyone. That\u2019s fucked up.\u201d and walked out.<\/p>\n<p>I can\u2019t even be innocuously polite and pleasant to people at my job (where customer service is the number one thing we are supposed to be focusing on) for fear of this shit happening. What happens if he had decided to wait until my shift was over?\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>New Rule: If she\u2019s at work, SHE\u2019S NOT FLIRTING WITH YOU.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Guys, stop bothering women while they\u2019re working. You\u2019re just being annoying. People have jobs to do that aren\u2019t related to you, and the world doesn\u2019t revolve around your fragile, desperate egos.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>and please don\u2019t ask us when we get off. It sends the creep alarm all the way off. <\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Here\u2019s my story: I was in a bookstore as a customer, with my partner. I went to the counter to ask for a book and my partner trailed along behind me. The guy tells me where I can find it and as I walk away to get it he says to my partner \u201cdid you see that hot chick flirting with me, I\u2019m gonna hit that later\u201d to which my partner replied \u201cthat\u2019s my fucking wife.\u201d <\/p>\n<p>Asking you to do your job is not flirting.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>One time at work I found out that a male coworker thought I was\u00a0\u201cin love\u201d with him. I literally just had conversations with him like I would with all my other coworkers. But no, apparently that meant I must be in love with him.\u00a0I don\u2019t understand why guys think that being civil is flirting?? Every time I have been friends with a guy there is always a point when they\u2019ll either ask me \u201care you flirting with me?\u201d or \u201cdo you have a crush on me??\u201d. Why do you assume that just because I\u2019m treating you like a human being then I MUST want to jump your bones. Your egos need to calm the fuck down tbh.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>When I was a barista as Starbucks I constantly had guys taking drinks and giving me a creepy smile or asking if I made it special for them. <\/p>\n<p>Trust me dude, your half-caf vanilla latte is no more special than the person behind you.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>This is such a long post but YES. I got this for 10 years and retail. You\u2019re trained to smile and be polite. You HAVE to or you get in trouble. The amount of dudes that have mistaken that for flirting\u2026 Boggles the mind.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>DO NOT. CHAT UP. WOMEN. WHEN THEY\u2019RE WORKING.<\/p>\n<p>DO NOT.<\/p>\n<p>DO. NOT.<\/p>\n<p>because let me tell you something. best case scenario, you\u2019re making her uncomfortable. worst case, you\u2019re scaring the shit out of her.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve been harassed and stalked so many times in my retail career it\u2019s unreal.  after the worst incident, I got special permission to wear a false nametag from then on.<\/p>\n<p>I was stalked by a man I spoke to once. two sentences. I greeted him on  entering the store and asked if he needed anything. he read my nametag and asked for my number. my male coworker tagged in and let me go stock the backroom until he left.<br \/>weird, but seemed harmless enough.<br \/>until he called the store every day to ask if I was working.<br \/>and asked repeatedly for my schedule, claiming to be my boyfriend. he happened to have the same first name as the guy I was seeing at the time.<\/p>\n<p>thankfully, this had happened to enough women across the company that disclosing a coworkers schedule over the phone to anyone other than that coworker, even if it was one of their family members, was a fireable offense. so no one ever did it.<br \/>he kept at it for SIX. MONTHS.<br \/>I transferred to another store. he didn\u2019t believe my coworkers when he was told that I didn\u2019t work there anymore, including new hires who had never even met me and knew me only as \u2018the girl who used to work here whose stalker won\u2019t stop calling.\u2019 he got hostile. came by and confronted my friend Dave, who had been my supervisor when we worked in the same location and who had been there during my first and only in-person contact with my stalker.<br \/>thankfully, Dave is a very good actor.<br \/>he told my stalker, tearfully, that I really had transferred to another store. in the city. and that a few days after starting at my new store, I was tragically hit by a bus while walking to work and had passed away.<\/p>\n<p>the daily phone calls finally stopped after that.<\/p>\n<p>I had to FAKE MY DEATH to get away from this fucker. who I had greeted once. because it was my job.<\/p>\n<p>this happens to women in retail often enough that some national companies have guidelines on handing these situations right in the orientation handbook.<\/p>\n<p>hell, our store even had a special \u2018I need help but I can\u2019t make a scene because I would be endangering myself\u2019 code. SARA. Send Assistance Right Away. if someone on the sales floor asked a question about \u2018sara\u2019 (ex: \u2018hey, is sara working today?\u2019) that meant call security and get to that coworker ASAP.<\/p>\n<p>she is being paid to be nice to you.<\/p>\n<p>the only reason she isn\u2019t calling you a creep and telling you to leave is that she is so dependent on her job that she\u2019s weighing her options: is he more of a danger to me than my loss of income would be if I got fired for telling him off?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>nikkibot3000: kateordie: lipstickstainedlove: thearomantic: octoberreads: dynastylnoire: angelicroses: bonequeer: radicalrebellion: baronsledjoys: firecannotkillafitblr: This drives me mad. I used to work in a bookstore, and was talking to my coworker and he just yelled out \u201cstop flirting with me!\u201d at this ridiculous volume and it was humiliating because\u00a01. I wasn\u2019t2. I got in trouble for acting unprofessional\u00a03. &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2015\/11\/28\/nikkibot3000-kateordie\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"gallery","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[2090,62,4],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/125198"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=125198"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/125198\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":125201,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/125198\/revisions\/125201"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=125198"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=125198"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=125198"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}