{"id":113522,"date":"2016-02-17T14:56:26","date_gmt":"2016-02-17T14:56:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/02\/17\/roane72-soyeahso-i-need-to-talk-about-han\/"},"modified":"2016-02-17T14:56:26","modified_gmt":"2016-02-17T14:56:26","slug":"roane72-soyeahso-i-need-to-talk-about-han","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/02\/17\/roane72-soyeahso-i-need-to-talk-about-han\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

roane72<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

soyeahso<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

I need to talk about Han Solo. \u00a0Specifically Han Solo as a father.\u00a0<\/p>\n

This is something that has bothered me since the first time I saw The Force Awakens, but it\u2019s also something I\u2019ve felt reluctant to talk about because we\u2019re all in mourning for one of our childhood heroes.<\/p>\n

But I do want to talk about it because it hits on a fairly personal issue for me and I suspect for a lot of people.\u00a0<\/p>\n

When Han says that they did everything they could, that there was too much Vader in his son, this was a man rejecting responsibility for the role he may have played in how his child turned out. This was a man saying that that child had a fundamental flaw that had nothing to do with him. \u00a0<\/p>\n

Think about who Darth Vader is to Han Solo. \u00a0He\u2019s the man who had him frozen in carbonite. \u00a0He tortured Leia and had a direct hand in the destruction of her home. \u00a0He severed Luke\u2019s hand. <\/p>\n

He was responsible for the deaths of millions. I have a feeling that Han put about as much stock in the depth of Vader\u2019s end of life redemption as Kylo Ren does. \u00a0<\/p>\n

Does anyone think for one second that Ben Solo was not fully aware of what his father thought of him? \u00a0Children hear and understand so much more than we give them credit for. Even if young Ben never heard anyone refer to him this way, he is a powerful telepath (and possibly, despite how he tries to kill it, an empath like his mother.)<\/p>\n

Headcanon time. My feeling is that Ben Solo was a sensitive, serious child, and that he and Han were never truly able to relate to each other. Ben may have acted out early on, whether because of Snoke\u2019s influence or because of his own inner turmoil. \u00a0(Make no mistake, even if his home was loving there is no way it was stable. He was born at the end of a war, to a family in the vanguard, and wars never tie up neatly.)<\/p>\n

So did his parents \u00a0make the same mistake so many others do when their children go astray? Instead of looking for a flaw in the child\u2019s nurturing, looking at it as a flaw in the child\u2019s nature? \u00a0We know from the novelization that Leia was aware of Snoke\u2019s influence but didn\u2019t tell Han. If Han had known, would he have looked at his son differently, or would it have made the situation seem even more hopeless?<\/p>\n

I think the reason it struck me as hard as it did is because it only took one time for me to overhear my mother telling someone how much like my deadbeat, addict father I was, for it to have a huge effect on my sense of self and personal agency. \u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

But, hey, maybe Han didn\u2019t think about his son this way at all when Ben was growing up. Maybe\u00a0\u201cthere was too much Vader in him\u201d is the thing he said to himself afterward, so he wouldn\u2019t go crazy wondering what he could have done differently.\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

All of this. For me, so much of the power in TFA comes from the depressing realization that my childhood heroes were, in the end, overwhelmingly human. When Kylo Ren tells Rey,\u00a0\u201cHe only would have disappointed you,\u201d that sounds so much like someone speaking from experience.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I love Han Solo, I do, he\u2019s one of my childhood heroes, like I said, but ultimately, I think as a human being, he was possibly the worst possible father a kid like Ben Solo could have had. Not out of lack of love or concern\u2013it\u2019s obvious that he loved his son\u2013but just because of a lack of understanding. (I get that. I was an sensitive, shy kid and I grew up feeling like the cuckoo in the nest.) I\u2019m sure Leia tried to help bridge the gap (of the original trio, she comes out the best, honestly), but I don\u2019t think it was enough.\u00a0<\/p>\n

We don\u2019t know what Luke\u2019s relationship was to Ben. It\u2019s one of the things I am DYING to find out, what that dynamic was. Did he try to act as a surrogate father, and if so, did Ben resent him for it? And I want a damn good explanation for why he packed up and ran away from all of his responsibilities beyond some sort of half-assed spiritual quest, because I am VERY disappointed in him.<\/p>\n

Ultimately, that\u2019s another reason I want a redemption arc for Kylo Ren\u2013not just for his own sake, but as a chance for the adults in his life to fix what they helped break, and for Han, Leia, and Luke to redeem themselves too.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

roane72: soyeahso: I need to talk about Han Solo. \u00a0Specifically Han Solo as a father.\u00a0 This is something that has bothered me since the first time I saw The Force Awakens, but it\u2019s also something I\u2019ve felt reluctant to talk about because we\u2019re all in mourning for one of our childhood heroes. But I do … <\/p>\n

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