{"id":108803,"date":"2016-03-21T19:29:26","date_gmt":"2016-03-21T19:29:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/03\/21\/barlowstreet-genderific-satanstrousers\/"},"modified":"2016-03-21T19:29:26","modified_gmt":"2016-03-21T19:29:26","slug":"barlowstreet-genderific-satanstrousers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.merindab.com\/private\/2016\/03\/21\/barlowstreet-genderific-satanstrousers\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

barlowstreet<\/a>:<\/p>\n

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genderific<\/a>:<\/p>\n

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satanstrousers<\/a>:<\/p>\n

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You know how in action movies the main guy is always like \u201cYeah I\u2019ve got a contact here in Uzbekistan that owes me a favor\u201d for no discernible reason but it occurred to me that like that\u2019s basically what internet friends are like if I was in that situation I\u2019d be like \u201cYeah don\u2019t worry leave it to me. I\u2019ve got a mutual in the Netherlands whose selfie I reblogged one time.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

#If you ever come to Chile looking for a member of an evil organization<\/a>\u00a0#And you need someone to help you kill them and hide the body<\/a>\u00a0#Holla @ me just sayin\u2019<\/a>\u00a0#No but seriously now I\u2019m thinking about an actual action movie<\/a>\u00a0#In which the hero is like \u2018don\u2019t worry I have a contact there. I follow them on twitter\u2019<\/a>\u00a0#\u2018we talked about our mutual love of nutella one\u2019<\/a>\u00a0#\u2018and they said I looked cute in my selfie\u2019<\/a>\u00a0#\u2018they\u2019re legit. I know they can be trusted\u2019<\/a>\u00a0#Everything said with a super serious action movie hero voice<\/a>\u00a0#And said to the leader of whatever thing the hero works for<\/a>\u00a0#Who is a super serious person who wears suits and frowns a lot<\/a>\u00a0#My imagination went funny places<\/a><\/p>\n

(Fefy\u2019s tags)<\/p>\n

No but seriously though. \u00a0You know that trope where there\u2019s some ordinary dude who gets pulled into a web of intrigue by some badass sexy lady and then ends up being even better at stuff than the lady? \u00a0Imagine that reversed. \u00a0Imagine some English Lit grad student with a huge fandom tumblr accidentally witnesses a crime and some badass spy dude shows up and is like \u201cyour life is in danger, you have to come with me, and now that you\u2019re involved you might as well help us track down the bad guys\u201d and it\u2019s funny because she\u2019s not at all an action type but then he\u2019s like \u201cwell it looks like the bad guys are doing something devious in New Zealand, better set up camp in an abandoned mine shaft\u201d and she\u2019s all \u201cNo wait, I totally know someone there who always tags me in reblogs about my obscure OTPs, she would 1000% let us use her place, look I already fanmailed her\u201d and then later he\u2019s like \u201cOh, we found the bad guy camp in rural Sweden but there\u2019s no time for backup to arrive from our base before their evil plan goes down!\u201d and she\u2019s like \u201cOh hold up, did you say Sweden, because I defs know someone from there and they always leave super supportive replies on my personal posts and they will definitely have my back, give me a sec to send them an ask\u201d and the dude is like \u201cHOW DO YOU HAVE A BETTER INTERNATIONAL NETWORK OF ALLIES THAN ME\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I\u2019ve got a closet I could stuff you in in Canada.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

barlowstreet: genderific: satanstrousers: You know how in action movies the main guy is always like \u201cYeah I\u2019ve got a contact here in Uzbekistan that owes me a favor\u201d for no discernible reason but it occurred to me that like that\u2019s basically what internet friends are like if I was in that situation I\u2019d be like … <\/p>\n

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