In Sherlock Irene Adler is just as obsessed with outwitting Holmes as he is with outwitting her, and I feel like that’s a fundamental misreading of the source material, because in Doyle’s version Holmes happens to get in Irene’s way, so she does the functional equivalent of trapping him under a cup, sliding a newspaper under him and dumping him out in the backyard.

















things sherlock holmes has canonically done:

  • scrapbooked the hell out of his newspapers
  • put on a hat that was too big for him 
  • giggled
  • cried because lestrade was nice to him
  • got all sappy and romantic by smelling a rose
  • let a puppy lead him on adventures
  • “impish mood”
  • lit his pipe with an ember from the fireplace because he thought it looked cool

feel free to add to this

  • built a pillow fort in a client’s house
  • told a guy he was giving him secret government documents and then gave him a book about bees instead
  • told watson stories about his past solely to avoid cleaning his room

oh i almost forgot

  • decorated his room with pictures of famous criminals
  • Ordered a picnic for a pair of newlyweds
  • Was offended that Watson doesn’t praise his skills as a housekeeper
  • Waived his fee if his clients are too poor to pay him
  • Made hot chocolate to wake Watson up on a cold morning
  • Danced around and bowed to imaginary friends
  • ‘Flushed up with pleasure’ when being praised
  • Wouldn’t explain how he comes to conclusions because he was worried Watson would think he is ordinary
  • Grabs Watson’s hand when he’s frightened
  • Let another puppy lead him on adventures.


Leaped over furniture like a gazelle.

•Shook hands with a baby :,}

  • noticed watson looking sad and touching his old war wound and tried to cheer him up with some deductions about his sparkling eyes
  • deliberately knocked over a table, shattering a glass fruit bowl which sent fruit rolling everywhere, then blamed it on watson and ran away

  • was not surprised when a dog died after its owner died, due to the “beautiful, faithful nature of dogs”
  • sent watson a telegram telling him to come over at once so he could tell him his most recent thoughts about dogs and the importance of their emotions to detective work
  • told Watson anecdotes about his favorite violinist for an hour while they had lunch together
  • made a little diagram out of breadcrumbs while explaining something to Watson

  • Shared a room with watson in a house that had 11 bedrooms
  • Makes his client wait while he changes into slippers
  • Has a realistic dummy made of himself and uses it to fool a client
    • twice
    • in the same story

Let a jewel thief off one time because: 

a, the thief cried 

b, the case had been really easy & if the Yard couldn’t solve it then frankly fuck em

c, it was Christmas

And People ™ still think he was an unfeeling, cold man of reason. Honey that man probably slept with a fluffy stuffed bee.

Made a BIG drama about killing a jellyfish with a rock

Being a well-paid, soppy mess who retires to keep bees is #TheDream

Some more!

-Employed a bunch of street urchins, and talked to them like a general with his troops.

-Tore up Watson’s trousers to check him for injuries.

-Lets a man get away with murder because it would keep a pair of sweethearts from being hurt.

-Stops an investigation so he can go look at flowers with Watson

-Still loves dogs even after getting his ankle torn up by one.

Let a murderer go because he did it to avenge his love who had been murdered.

Nearly cried when Watson was shot, knocked the shooter out with the butt of his gun and then threatened to kill him when he woke up.